Halloween Makeup!

Jess as Black Swan

Products used: Revlon Colourstay Foundation in beige; Illamasqua Liquid Metal in Electrum; Maybelline Master Precise Eyeliner in black; Inglot AMC White Highlighting Powder; Inglot Black Matte Eyeshadow in 39; Benefit Blush in Throb

Maria as Beetlejuice

Products used: Illamasqua Cream Pigment in Hollow, Delirium and Mould; Revlon Colourstay Pressed Powder; Mehron Scar Wax; Illamasqua Pure Pigment in Conquer (discontinued).

The green is around the contours and cannot be seen in the photo but the shimmer gave the look a bit of class!

 

Movies i’ve seen at the movies (Jan- Mar ’12)

WEEK 1 (02/01/12- 08/01/12) Women on the 6th Floor *3 1/2 STARS* Highly anticipated (by me) since August last year when Palace Cinemas started promoting it. There are some LOLworthy moments and it features some wonderful old lady banter but it is overly long. Also, the main love story kinda muddles along and then you’re like WHHHHAAAAAATTT? when something actually happens cause it’s just not plausible, I think this plot line was some old guys dream made into film.
OLD LADY FACTOR: Carmen Maura, my best mate.

WEEK 2 (09/01/12- 15/01/12) Albert Nobbs *3 STARS* Not the biggest fan of this film. Kudos to all the work Glenn Close put into this, her performance is reserved and explosive simultaneously but the film lacks the kind of intrigue and character development that a film like, say, Gosford Park, has. Janet McTeer is a stand out as Albert’s confident and successful cross-dressing buddy. A poignant piece of film making but lacking in depth.
OLD LADY FACTOR: Glenn Close and Janet McTeer in drag if you’re into that kind of thing. Oh and Maria Doyle Kennedy, hellz yeah!

WEEK 3 (16/01/12- 22/01/12) Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy *2 STARS* Let me just clarify, those two stars are for the casting director. Johnny Hurt, Gary Oldman, Colin Firth, Toby Jones, Mark Strong, Ciaran Hinds= Old man heaven. This was a very well made film, aesthetically and performativley (if you can use that word in this context, if it is even a word) but the narrative was all over the place. Perhaps it was just my small mind but I think unless you had read the books or seen the original miniseries, it was impossible to understand. From start to finish I had no idea what was going on, nothing, I grasped nothing. I just know that Colin Firth and Mark Strong could’ve hooked up but they didn’t. Whatta shame.
OLD MAN FACTOR: Entire cast. Dayyyyummm boys!

WEEK 4 (23/01/12- 29/01/12) Young Adult *3 STARS* It’s hard to watch a movie when you hate the main character. I think we were supposed to hate her and that confused my mainstream-manipulated mind. Charlize Theron as Mavis wasn’t remotely likable and she never redeemed herself (at one point you were like ‘here she goes, show me your compassionate side’ but she just fucks us over again). The film had it’s fair share of well written and directed cringe-worthy moments and awkward encounters but as an audience member, one’s hate for Mavis and pity for all those who came in contact with her made the film viewing an uncomfortable experience.
OLD LADY FACTOR: Jill Eikenberry, naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw! Tough times.

WEEK 5 (30/01/12- 05/02/12) Martha Marcy May Marlene *4 STARS* The fractured narrative of this film flowed smoothly, adding to the suspense of the story and aiding character development. A lot of what Martha goes through in the cult environment is left to the imagination. We are made to feel with her, rather than learn solely about her through her actions and words (which are few). The performances are natural and emotive. John Hawkes is fucking creepy as the enigmatic cult leader and Elizabeth Olsen is solid as the confused Martha. The cinematography showcases the haunting locations that Martha inhabits and highlights her isolation with an abundance of wide shots. Overall, a well written, directed and wonderfully edited film with fine performances all around.
OLD LADY FACTOR: No one, it was a sad day for us all.

WEEK 6 (06/02/12- 12/02/12) Was broke this week.

WEEK 7 (13/02/12- 19/02/12) Shame *3 1/2 STARS* Things I have learnt from watching this movie: Carey Mulligan is a terrific actress, Michael Fassbinder is creepalicious and if I saw him on the train yeah I’d probs be like ‘Oh haaaaiiii’ but i’d also get the sexual predator vibe off him and start to feel uncomfortable so…  This film is intense. Really intense. There’s not as much sex as I thought there was going to be, given it’s R rating. The general desperation and despair felt and shown throughout this movie, however, is enough to warrant it’s adult rating. The main characters are fucked. All of them. The characters are well developed despite their troubled past (assumedly contributing to their present downfall) only being alluded to. The film is a little monotonous but I think the director has chosen to keep it this way, monotony and routine being an integral part of the main character’s daily life. A depressing journey for all viewers but well worth seeing for its dramatic content.
OLD LADY FACTOR: No one. Living on the dark side.

WEEK 8 (20/02/12- 26/02/12) The Grey *3 1/2 STARS* This is a man’s movie. Female presence is lacking; there was an air hostess but she got killed in the plane crash and later her face gets mauled off by a wolf. Nice. Liam Neeson plays a badass who battles and survives a plane crash, death, hunger, angry wolves, blizzards, vengeful wolves, extreme cold and more large packs of aggressive wolves. All the while he gives philosophic advice to his slowly dwindling pack of stereotypical comrades. He basically walks around the Alaskan wilderness until everyone around him dies and he’s just like “fuck this, fuck you God! I don’t need anyone, fuck you wolves! Everyone can get fucked! I’m gonna tape shards of broken glass to my knuckles and kill some mother fucking wolves, are you ready?!” That’s basically the movie, you should go see it. Some top notch bullshit.
OLD MAN FACTOR: A bit of Liam Neeson never hurt anyone.

Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?

The Breadline of Rome.

Finally finished Rome. Good, dirty, violent times. Did the Roman’s really have that much sex? With everyone? Did they have herpes back then cause pretty sure no one was disclosing their status if they did. I’ll look that up later. For now I want to talk about a couple of ladies who appeared in the last couple of episodes in teeny tiny parts. Well, I lie; Kathryn Hunter had an occuring part, playing Cleopatra’s right hand servant, Charmian. The other actor I wanted to mention was Anne Lambton, you may know her as the predatory snake lady with purple eyes in Nicholas Roeg’s The Witches:

Or that woman who made you keep your night light on until you were 12.

Lambton played the ‘pharmacopolist’ whose role in the episode was to supply abortion herbs to a shifty bitch. No questions asked, over the counter abortion concoctions were apparently pretty easy to get back in the days. I wonder if they had remedies for Herpes? Anyway, I like a good Anne Lambton sighting so although she was only in two episodes for a total of forty seconds I was pretty happy. And apart from the hair I don’t think she has aged much since her purple eyed days:

"Will you be using the drugs for yourself? No? Owkay, go for it."

On to Kathryn Hunter; I would love to see this woman perform live, I hear the stage is where she is in her element. Her film work compromises of generally small parts, including a lovely role as a pushy French taxi passenger in Mike Leigh’s All or Nothing and as Harry’s neighbour Arabella Figg in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

In "All or Nothing".

Her role on Rome is small too but important. The dynamics between servant and master (Cleopatra is played brilliantly by Lyndsey Marshal) are wonderful and balanced. Hunter’s calmness, dignity and tolerance balances out the erratic, almost bipolar nature of Marshal’s Cleopatra.

Just watching a guy cop an arrow to the jugular, the norm.

I realise there wasn’t much point to this post, I really just wanted to post the caps I made from Rome. It’s been hot, ok, I had to stay inside… and screencap Rome… Naaaaaawwww!

Kathryn Hunter as a man, holding a giant dick in "Celestina"

That is all.

Review: “Why I hate Bill Henrickson” (Big Love)

HBO’s Big Love created by Mark V. Olsen and Will Scheffer is about a fundamentalist Mormon family living in suburban Utah. Bill Henrickson (Bill Paxton) is the patriarch of the said family, he has nine children with his three wives; Barb (Jeanne Tripplehorn), Nikki (Chloe Sevigny) and Margene (Ginnifer Goodwin). Shit is always going down.

Bill Henrickson is also a giant douche.

I realise that by watching TV shows in marathon form over a few weeks pulverises your mind and makes you crazy. I had the same problem with Weeds after being forced to watch five seasons in a Bali hotel room for a whole week. By the way, I hate Nancy Botwin. I think by watching the same characters make the same mistakes over and over again, hour after hour of episode after episode, something clicks in our brain and makes us hate the characters that we are supposed to feel sympathy or joy or really anything for. It’s like travelling with a friend; you can’t spend that much time with someone, be reliant on that person, live, spew and take suspicious drugs with that person and not grow to despise them at least to some minute capacity. Television marathons and a viewers relationship to the characters they’re watching work in much the same way.

Bill keeps fucking up. When will he learn? When will he look at himself and say “Yeah, i’m a douche, maybe I should stop being one.” I know this is hard for normal people and even harder for fictional characters in TV shows because writers need that constant conflict. Bill’s conflict is himself although he treats his wives as if they are the problem. Which they are in many cases but that’s what happens when you have three wives, Bill. Nikki spends money on bullshit, Barb is so self-righteous it makes me sick, Margie has her flaws but is the most sympathetic of the main characters. She seems to be in tune with the real world outside the secretive bubble of polygamy that she and her family live in, something that Bill is not so good at. Sure Bill tries, he wants the best for his family but as the seasons progress he becomes more and more self centred, claiming his own wants and needs to be for the good of the family. I used to understand why he was a douche but now he’s just being ridiculous. But it’s his hypocrisy, which is called out by his daughter Sarah (Amanda Seyfried) and most noticeably by his “4th wife” Ana (Branka Katic), that is just too much to handle. Everything is about him, he screws over his business partners (three of them), he cheats on his wives and he just becomes the biggest poon to roam the world of television.

Why do I keep watching you ask? I keep thinking it will get better, that he will see the light. I’ve also invested too much wasted time into the show not to waste anymore. Also, I watch it for the good times; Harry Dean Stanton, Mary Kay Place, Sissy Spacek, Melora Walters and my favourite good times:

Faces of Haggard Steel.

Yep, Bruce Dern as Bill’s shitbag father on the compound (basically the trailer park of Mormonism), Mireille Enos as Jodeen (and her twin sister Kathy), Bill’s father’s newest wife and Grace Zabriske (known best for starring in David Lynch’s mind) as Bill’s mother Lois. There are no better scenes than the ones where these three light it up, try to kill each other, smuggle birds, try to kill each other again and horrify yet arouse me at the same time. Another stand out who unfortunately is only in a handful of episodes is Sandy Martin as Selma Green, a compound crony wife of one of the Mormon mob bosses (none of this is cannon, I just assume Mormon mob boss to be his role). She dresses like a man, probably to be taken seriously by the ruling men around her, she is undoubtedly one fierce bitch.

Sandy Martin and Harry Dean Stanton being acting gangstahs.

So let’s sum everything up: Bill Henrickson, I have no sympathy for your fictional life because I kind of hate you but supporting cast are pretty hot ‘n’ fun.

Mini Review: Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

“Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy” was like walking into a room of old men who were halfway through a conversation talking smack and when you asked them what they were talking about they spat in your face. Because of this I do not know what happened in the movie, at all. I really couldn’t tell you. I know that Gary Oldman walked around a lot and there were quite a few gay subplots going on due to lack of women I presume (female presence was on the low side, basically Kathy Burke, some Russian chick and the back of another lady’s head). That’s about it. John Hurt was an alcoholic who carcked it in the first five minutes, nothing new. Maybe the book would help me understand. How could someone cast the entire “suave British blokes” acting population yet leave me with so little will to live after witnessing the final product?

A picture I found in the dictionary under "suave".